Love
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Done
Don't know how to heal from it anymore. I've been trying... Trying so hard. But my heart always feels broken and numb. It's the best for her, and I wouldn't change it for the world. I'm just done trying to heal when every step I take I get pushed 5 miles back. So I'm just going to live my life. Try to be happy, and put myself around people that make me happy. The best I can do I feel like I already did. And that was for her. I love you always and forever!
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Hang in there. I think this is a common theme among all of us as birthmothers. I am at a place like that right now myself. The pain is so overwhelming some days.
ReplyDeleteYou did a beautiful thing. The hardest thing. If you were parenting right now people would be helping you, because it would be stressful. But because you made the most unselfish decision for your child, people don't always appreciate that it still hurts. It doesn't go away.
I hope you are able to surround yourself with those who will be an encouragement to you. And people who will let you grieve if you need to.
Plus a healthy balance of people who will help you see that it is OK to be happy. Even if you don't want to be.
Sending love and hugs from one birthmom to another.
Justina you are awesome, and tougher than you think. You made the decision, didn't you? And went through it... that's more than a lot of people can say, and even more than people who can say that they did it for love. You did it for the love that you had for that beautiful baby girl.
ReplyDeleteShe may not be yours to take care of, but she will always be a part of your life. I love my birth mother, I respect her, I am grateful for her, and I thank her, because she gave me the best thing in this world, and that's my mother now who I would trade nothing for.
You have all of us BIB girls here for you, plus so many more. Don't forget we are here for you 24/7 and not a second less. We love you to pieces! You are truly a great example of a tough girl to me, keep it up. I'm on your side.
Giving away your baby is not a wonderful, beautiful thing. It's a horrible, ugly brutal thing. No mother should have to give up her newborn! It's barbaric. You shouldn't feel happy or at peace. Adoption is cruel. It's the business of selling babies. Adoption agencies make big profits by selling your baby! Don't let this happen to you,
ReplyDelete